October 3-7 | Starting at $500the femme codes
a multi day retreat for queer-bodied humans across genders, identities, and stages of coming out or self-discovery
for any femme identifying human The Intention of the Retreat
This retreat feels edgy for me to put into the world and that’s exactly why it matters.
I’ve long felt resistant to embodiment spaces that rely on polarity, new age spirituality, or rigid ideas of what it means to be “feminine.” At the same time, I deeply wanted to create a space where people having a femme human experience could embrace the totality of who they are without having to perform, fix, or contort themselves to belong.
So many of us were taught, directly or indirectly, to play certain roles — to be pleasing, easy, desirable, composed, or “good.” Over time, these patterns don’t just shape how we relate to others, they shape how we relate to our own bodies. They impact our ability to relax, to receive, to stay present, and to fully inhabit sensation and intimacy.
For much of my life, I struggled to accept certain parts of myself. Without realising it, I measured my worth through how I was perceived in relationships, in intimacy, in how “together” or desirable I seemed. I often overrode my own needs and signals in order to be liked, chosen, or validated, leaving my body in a constant state of tension and self-monitoring.
The most profound shift came when I stopped orienting toward how I was being seen and started focusing on whether I felt safe to be all of me. As I built a relationship with my body rooted in self-trust rather than performance, something softened. My nervous system relaxed. My body no longer needed to brace or manage. And from that place of internal safety, pleasure became more accessible not forced, not chased, but allowed.
This retreat is a deep dive into that process.
It’s a space to gently explore the internal patterns and protective parts that keep us performing, controlling, or overriding ourselves, and to cultivate the kind of nervous system safety that allows the body to soften, open, and respond more fully to sensation, intimacy, and connectionself-worth → nervous system → pleasure
What Becomes Available After This Retreat
This retreat is for you if you…
• came out later in life (or are still questioning) and feel like your whole sense of self has been turned inside out
• feel disconnected, numb, or confused around pleasure, desire, or what you actually want sexually
• notice a pattern of overriding your body’s yes and no, people-pleasing in intimacy, or performing desire rather than feeling it
• carry shame about being queer, even if you’re “out” and supported on the surface
• intellectually understand concepts like internalised homophobia or compulsory heterosexuality, but haven’t yet felt their integration in your body
• struggle to fully relax into queer intimacy, sex, or connection, even when you deeply want it
• feel behind, awkward, or unsure of yourself in queer spaces, dating, or relationships
• long to genuinely like who you are, not just accept yourself in theory
are ready to feel safe enough in your body to experience queer pleasure, connection, and love without forcing, rushing, or proving anything
“Working with Jordy changed my life and because of the work we did together, I’m able to live life as my full queer self and discover the beauty that comes with that!”
- Nancy, past client
The way home to your queerness is through your body.Deep transformation happens when the body feels safe enough to tell the truth.
Ezra Somatics is built on a simple but deeply lived truth: the most transformative work doesn’t come from intensity alone; it comes from expanding our capacity to hold ourselves with honesty, compassion, and presence.
This work walks a very intentional line. We gently excavate what no longer fits (old protectors, inherited beliefs, ways of relating that once kept us safe) - while staying rooted in the body’s need for safety and integration. Nothing here is about overriding yourself, forcing catharsis, or pushing the nervous system beyond what it can meaningfully process.
There are many spaces that equate depth with intensity. I’ve learned, both personally and professionally, that real change happens differently. When the nervous system feels safe enough, new beliefs can land. New relational patterns can take hold. Pleasure, truth, and self-trust can emerge without effort or performance.
This is gentle work and it is not light work.
It’s deep because it’s integrated. It’s lasting because the body can actually receive it. And it’s designed to meet you exactly where you are, without needing you to prove anything or become someone else in the process..
The Themes That Guide This Retreat
Embodied Presence
Many queer people learn to live from the neck up, disconnected from their bodies as a way to cope or stay safe. This work supports you to come back into your body slowly and safely, rebuilding trust in your sensations, instincts, and inner truth so your desire and expression can arise naturally..Nervous System Safety
True liberation doesn’t come from pushing yourself to be more confident or expressive. It comes from feeling safe enough to soften. This retreat prioritises regulation, choice, and attunement so your body can let go of vigilance and begin to experience pleasure, connection, and intimacy without fear or pressure..Integration of Conditioning
Internalised homophobia and compulsory heterosexuality can live quietly in the body long after we’ve intellectually “worked it out.” This theme supports you to gently integrate those imprints, putting words to what you’ve felt and releasing patterns of shame, self-doubt, or self-abandonment that interfere with pleasure and connection..Reclaiming Sexual Truth
This is about creating a new sexual story — one rooted in honesty, consent, and self-trust. Through embodied practices and reflection, you’ll explore what actually feels true for you, learning to honour your desires, boundaries, and authentic expression without comparison or performance..Relational & Erotic Confidence As safety and self-trust deepen, confidence begins to emerge naturally. This work supports you to bring your embodied truth into relationships and intimacy, allowing connection, sex, and closeness to feel less confusing and more aligned with who you really are.
Facilitation and safety
Safety is not a side note in this work — it is the foundation.
All retreats are held by facilitators with lived queer experience and deep familiarity with the emotional, relational, and somatic realities of being queer in a world that wasn’t built for us. This isn’t theoretical. It’s embodied, relational, and informed by years of doing this work both personally and professionally.
My approach is trauma-informed, consent-led, and choice-based. Nothing here is about pushing, performing, or breaking through. We move slowly, with attunement to the nervous system, so each person can stay connected to themselves while exploring deeper layers of truth, intimacy, and expression.
You’ll always be encouraged to honour your own pace, your own boundaries, and your own yes and no. Support is available throughout, and the container is intentionally held with care so vulnerability can arise without fear, pressure, or comparison.
Because when safety is truly present, the body doesn’t need to protect, it can open, integrate, and actually receive what’s unfolding.
What’s Included
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• Daily facilitated somatic and embodiment practices grounded in safety, consent, and nervous system regulation
• Queer-specific integration work supporting the release of shame, internalised homophobia, and inherited conditioning
• Guided group processes designed to support reflection, connection, and embodied self-trust
• A 4-week post-retreat group integration container to support ongoing processing, embodiment, and real-life integration -
• Luxury accommodation for the duration of the retreat
• An intentionally intimate group size to ensure depth, care, and personalised facilitation
• A curated retreat environment designed for rest, regulation, and ease -
• Three high-quality, healthy meals per day, prepared by a private chef
• Thoughtfully designed menus to support energy, digestion, and overall wellbeing -
• Flights or travel to the retreat location
• Travel insurance
• Any personal expenses outside of what’s listed above
What’s not Included
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• Flights or travel to the retreat location
• Travel insurance
• Any personal expenses outside of what’s listed above
FAQ-
No. This retreat is designed to meet you exactly where you are. You don’t need to be confident, experienced, or “out” in any particular way, just open to showing up honestly and at your own pace.
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That’s incredibly common, especially for queer folks. This space is designed with that in mind. You’ll be supported to move slowly, stay choiceful, and honour your own boundaries throughout.
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Yes. This retreat is especially supportive for late bloomers, baby gays, and anyone navigating confusion, grief, or reorientation around their sexuality. You don’t need to have anything figured out to belong here.
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Integration is a core part of this work. You’ll receive post-retreat support to help you anchor what you’ve experienced into your everyday life, relationships, and sense of self.
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This retreat is clothing-optional, and everything that unfolds is always invitational. Some people may feel called to explore intimacy or sexuality, while others may not, both are equally welcome. There is no expectation, pressure, or requirement to engage in nudity, touch, or sexual exploration. Choice, consent, and listening to your own body are prioritised at all times.
investment
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$6,500 USD
Includes the full retreat experience, luxury accommodation, all meals, facilitation, curated extras, and the 4-week post-retreat integration container.
payment plans upon request
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$10,000 USD
Includes everything in the Standard Retreat Experience, plus:
• One private 1:1 somatic session with me before the retreat
• One private 1:1 somatic integration session after the retreatThis option is ideal if you’re navigating significant transitions or desire deeper personalised support.
payment plans upon request
Application Process
Because this is an intimate, high-touch retreat, all participants are invited to complete a short application and have a brief call with me before confirming their place.This isn’t an interview or assessment, it’s a space to connect, ask questions, and ensure the retreat is the right fit for you and for the group.If it feels aligned, you’ll be invited to move forward with your chosen investment option.